2004-05-29 - 1:34 a.m.

1:35 in the morning and the dog decided that she wasn't tired anymore so here I am. Guess I get to try to sleep again in an hour or so. So far the only nice thing I have going for me this weekend is no work Monday. Yay! I didn't do a thing tonight and I probably won't end up doing anything all weekend. I get to throw my back out, bitch for a few hours, and cry about how bad it hurts on Sunday. In other words help my girlfriend move. I can't wait. I hopefully will end up sloppy drunk somewhere this weekend mumbling nonsense and arguing with someone who has no idea what I am talking about. "Noooo! NO you don't get it man....It's like, back when the Iraqistanians' weren't free with the first George Bush, they were free and NOW with him, they are free but they aren't. It's like a throw twenty two. You just don't get it man, because I remember when I was younger there was dirnakakla.....Where the hell am I and where are my pants?"

I can't wait. I usually end up really drunk or drink two and get a headache...I feel old.

So I was on my way to work today and I was kind of zoning out listening to the radio. I had my windows rolled up because good old Chicago weather made it nice and windy and crappy outside. I was in the middle of the intersection waiting to turn left. By the time I noticed it cleared out, the light was red and I turned. I looked at the people waiting to turn left that I was blocking up, and one guy was hanging out of his van with his face all scrunched up pointing at me. Now I couldn't hear what he said, but I am avid lip reader and I think I made this out correctly....

"Hey, I think you did a hell of a good job making your 90° left turn! I envy safe drivers like you and if you were to run for president, I would vote for you because you are number one!"

Weird enough, he was shouting it at me and showing me I was number one on both of his hands. I waved and gave him the thumbs up to say thanks for your support. It's amazing what pisses people off these days.

Of all the emotions, of all the facial expressions and reactions, my favorite has to be the I almost fell over backwards in my chair reaction and face. The person knows they shouldn't lean back that far but they push it just a bit farther and that's when it happens. The arms immediately get thrown forward, the legs get fully extended, you immediately make the "Ooooo" face with a hint of surprise, you may start to sweat a bit, and you get that nice stomach dropping feeling. That will never stop being funny to me. Ok, so that just happened to me, so what? It won't matter when I am president. I already got one vote.

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