2004-12-02 - 11:55 p.m.

I have actually been looking forward to taking the time to create this entry as it has been on my mind for a few days now. Let's all hold hands and skip to my first topic okay?

Commercials....probably some of the most irritating things on the face of the planet. I have seen them on TV and heard them on the radio enough times that I feel I can pass judgement on them.

For those of you who read this who are from Chicago, this will make sense. Anyone else, kiss my white ass.

If you own a TV, you have no doubt seen the John M. Smithe Hoooooooome Makers commercials. The new versions of these show 3 homosexual brothers playing catch and pretending to tackle each other in a front yard. Ready for the kicker? They are wearing suits. Now I have worn a suit a good amount of times and I never once felt the need to engage in homosexual ass tackling in my front yard with my brother. The next part that bothers me is they show the name as Smith and then one of the fuck stains puts his cum ridden hand by the screen and POOF! The E' just appears!!! It's magic! Now they can go back to seeing who can shove the football farther up whose ass.

Next we have radio commercials. I tend to hear these a lot with computer commercials like Dell and HP. It always begins with a daughter named, RONPO, talking about nonsense. Ronpo you ask? Result Of Not Pulling Out. Anyways, this little mistake starts talking like,

Ronpo - "My friends think they are so cool because they have a new Compaq Presario 8700 DM+ with Hyperthreading Technology, 800 megahertz front side bus, and 512 Dual Data RAM."

Hot Sounding Mom - "Well hunny, then you need to find some friends who don't have the new Compaq 19" Flat Panel Monitor with build in hand job giver."

Then....the part that makes me want to sodomize my radio because it pisses me off so bad....

Stupid Dad - " :sigh: I just don't understand kids these days..."

It is the EXACT SAME FUCKING COMMERCIAL NO MATTER WHAT PRODUCT IT IS. I fucking don't think I can handle one more stupid asshole dad mumbling how he doesn't understand this whole "pop culture". Fuck you advertisers and a big FUCK YOU goes out to the stupid dad voice over actors. I hate you and I hope you never work again you cunts.

I feel better now that I got that out of my system.

So I was driving home from a work function thing where we had to see how many hookers we could rape, kill and bury in a single night....wait....that wasn't work...., and I stopped at a gas station to pee in their garbage can and sink. Some people may also call that, "use the bathroom" but whatever. I noticed on the wall the good old French Tickler/Cock Ring seller machine thingy. Now are these things sold anywhere BUT gas stations? Is it a weird trucker thing for when they pick up hitchers they will be ready with a weird bumpy dick and a never ending hard on? No wonder I hitch hike so much....anyways....

I believe that if men have to give women an engagement ring and all that other stuff, we should get a nice golden cock ring. They can get down on both knees.....and propose to our crotches. If they were feeling creative, they could have it engraved like:

"Dearest Ryan, I can't wait to empty your balls."

or....

"Everytime you touch your dick, think of me"

or....

"This is where my babies come from"

I am just giving some ideas out here and you can feel free to mix them up if you want. That is trend I would be more then happy to start.

All righty roo....I think it's time for me to shower since I smell and a rotting crotch. Until we meet again, I leave with my word of advice for the week....

"If there's grass on the field, shave it so it looks younger."

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